Recently (or since the new year), I have had SO much on my mind. Some days, I come home from work and just worry about things. To the point where I get upset! (Me, upset? Nahh)
What am I worried about right now? Ok, I'll start with one of the random ones. I feel very out of shape and unhealthy. Since I had surgery on my foot, I was given strict instructions to watch out for my physical activity for 9 months to a year. I thought that would be easy to do, but it turns out it was harder than I thought. 9 months hit in January so I'm hoping I can get back up to my normal activity level. I'd love to lose a few pounds and feel more energetic overall. Right now, by the time I get home from work, I HAVE to nap because I am so exhausted. That is not how I want to live my life!
Speaking of work... That's another thing I've got on my mind. I know for a fact I won't be staying here at ISU in the Housing Department for long. I am not happy here and I know that this is not the career path for me, like I once thought it was. So now what? Where do I go from here? Should I start looking for a new job now? Or should I go back to school? I am very stressed about finding a place for graduate school.
Graduate school. That was a good lead in. Do I want to go back to school? I can be honest with you all and say that I don't really want to go back to school. By the time I got to my senior year of college, I was done with the books and standard tests. I wanted to get out in the world and experience things rather than read about them. But now I wonder... is continuing my education the best thing for my career and future? Should I find a way to dig in and go back to school? Where in the heck am I going to go?
Another factor in this decision is the money. I am blessed by the generosity of my parents who decided to pay for both my 4 years of school as well as Doug's. So I am in great shape in the sense that I don't have 4 years of college student loans. But the cost of graduate school does worry me. I know, I know, there are ways to get assistance... Graduate Assistantships and what not. But I worry about my current experience with a job that is similar to an assistantship and balancing school.
Speaking of paying for it... the last thing on my mind is money. MONEY. Oh my gosh this is on my mind just about 24/7. When unexpected expenses come up (my car battery dieing, dropping my laptop, etc) I can take care of it, but I worry about all of things I am trying to save for... all of the dang time! I feel like my paychecks just aren't enough... and I can't even describe how worried I was around tax time. I want to pay for so much.... Graduate school? Buying my own car? An apartment?
Apartments! A place to live? Not only this summer, but beyond... where am I going? Should I move back in with my parents? Boy that'll be a tough adjustment after this past year of living on my own. But there's no way I cant afford my own place with the money I'm making now, let alone without a confirmed job this summer.... and most likely without a roommate. Where do I even look for apartments? Is there like a website? How do I know if the rates are good?
Whew. Well, you definitely got the full list of current concerns. It just keeps going! The end of February is approaching and I can't stop thinking about the immediate future. Oh boy! Well, it does feel good to have it all written down... it's just time to make some things happen!
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